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Post by Velkontés on Oct 24, 2010 7:10:27 GMT -5
I think I've got this right Wayne Rooney is Mancena United's top face Alex Ferguson is his manager Monday: Rooney turns heel by announcing he won't be signing a contract extension. Tuesday: Ferguson cuts a promo saying how shocked and disappointed he is. Wednesday: In a backstage interview, United's hated rivals, Manchester City, claim they would have no interest in buying Rooney. Nope, none at all. Thursday: Tenay and TazThe British press yap on and on about how this is going to change the face of football forever, and how Rooney is absolutely going to leave Manchester United. Eric Bischoff guarantees it, in fact. Friday: Rooney signs a new five year deal with... Manchester United! Swerve! Rooney cuts a promo going on about how he cares so much for the club. s h i t t y w r i t i n g
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Post by MasterSnit on Oct 24, 2010 15:04:23 GMT -5
It seems Rooney just bischoffed the procedure of saying that he wanted more money and it escalated into a classic TNA storyline. ![](http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a134/RandyMarsh/fergieroonoff.jpg)
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Post by Champ on Oct 25, 2010 1:11:17 GMT -5
I love when life has s h i t t y w r i t i n g by accident. It's when the shitty writing is intentional, I get aggrivated
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Post by MasterSnit on Oct 29, 2010 13:49:00 GMT -5
I think we might have missed an off-camera development on the Thursday evening of Fergie battering Rooney half to death in a toilet and forcing him to sign the contract in his own blood. If he didn't there would be a sex tape, secretly filmed on orders from Fergie, of Rooney indulging in a gangbang with the members of an over-80s bingo club, two transsexual hermaphrodites and a camel, sent out promptly to every media outlet on Earth.
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Post by Velkontés on Oct 30, 2010 5:33:56 GMT -5
Well, Rooney is Ferguson's best player. I'm sure he really really wants to keep him.
I think you know where I'm going with this
THUNDEROUS FACE POP
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Post by Velkontés on Feb 29, 2012 1:14:43 GMT -5
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Post by Snitskyman2016 on Feb 29, 2012 20:19:51 GMT -5
Thanks V, that does sound exactly like IMPACT Wrestling.
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Post by MasterSnit on Mar 3, 2012 18:48:18 GMT -5
I don't get it, but it sounds like something Taz would say.
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Post by Velkontés on Mar 4, 2012 4:22:37 GMT -5
Did you click on the link, Mastersnit? It's a rundown of that David Haye / Derrick Chisora.... thing... that reads exactly like a Pro Wrestling angle.
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Post by Champ on Mar 6, 2012 15:00:31 GMT -5
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Post by MasterSnit on Mar 6, 2012 16:19:32 GMT -5
Did you click on the link, Mastersnit? It's a rundown of that David Haye / Derrick Chisora.... thing... that reads exactly like a Pro Wrestling angle. Oh, I didn't realise it is a link. Yeah, that was a bit like a wrestling storyline. Are you a boxing fan V, or did you read about it because it got mainstream coverage? I watched the actual Klitschko vs Chisora bout and then got a good laugh at all the stuff that happened afterwards. No matter what people say and think about it now, we know that in a year's time these two guy will be lying on a beach somewhere enjoying the millions that they have earned after fighting each other in an actual boxing ring. I think Kane might have watched this unfold too and took some tips. Realising he didn't have a WrestleMania match, he picked a fight with someone else who is also available and can assist him in manufacturing a big match at WrestleMania and making loads of money. And that bear is like the woodland equivalent to TNA's television champion. They both disappear when the tv cameras arrive.
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Post by Velkontés on Mar 7, 2012 15:27:53 GMT -5
Are you a boxing fan V, or did you read about it because it got mainstream coverage? No, not a boxing fan, but I did hear about it (V is a listener of Radio 5). One of my favourite parts of that report: "Boxers are gentlemen and show to the world an example of honour and fair play when, after a tremendous battle, they go to the centre of the ring to pay respect to each other. Dereck Chisora is not going to tarnish the sport for those born in the humblest beds, who become sports heroes of the world to live a life of dignity and pride." Apparently boxing doesn't take place on Earth.
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Post by MasterSnit on Mar 9, 2012 17:30:51 GMT -5
Boxing is full of ridiculous stories that TNA and wrestling might struggle to match, lol. There was actually one just a week ago that would fit right in to any wrestling angle. www.boxingscene.com/bautista-victim-switch-scandal-genaro-garcia-bout--50192Basically, a Filipino fighter was scheduled to fight a respected Mexican fighter in the Philippines. However, when the Mexican showed up to fight, he was a completely different fighter to the guy that was supposed to be fighting. This other guy was a tomato can/jobber and the only similarity was that he had the same name as the guy who was supposed to show up. The fight went ahead as scheduled.
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Post by Champ on Mar 11, 2012 0:09:19 GMT -5
Just read this thing I posted down here all the way through. When you get to the last paragraph, tell me it's not a TNA shocking, yet extremely stupid and pointless ending!
Unspeakably Stupid Story #1: The Angry Bail Bondsman
From 1989 until 1994, I had this really nice '89 Honda Prelude. It was the most reliable, well-built car I ever owned, which is saying a lot, because I have owned four Lexii. However, there were two problems with the car. One, it was slow. It had the biggest engine you could get in a Honda, but the automatic tranny made it a snail-mobile. Two, I couldn't take it out of my garage without someone getting mad and flipping me off. I guess it was the appearance of the car -- it was fire-engine red, with an aftermarket wing, tinted windows, custom wheels & tires, $3000 worth of stereo, and a license plate which bore my actual first name. Change lanes? Get flipped off. Merge into traffic? Get flipped off. Run a yellow light? Get flipped off. It became tiresome.
Anyway, one day in 1991, I was driving to work. I was patiently waiting for my turn to use the on-ramp when some type-A jerk in a gold Mercedes sedan decides HE'S not going to wait, he needs to cut into the line NOW, and furthermore, I'm the guy who's going to let him in line in front of me. Sorry, Charlie, no such luck. The guy behind me lets him cut in though, so now the guy is PISSED and he's behind me. Once on the freeway, I change to the left lane, and Mr. Dickhead in the Merc has already changed lanes and is RIGHT BEHIND ME and now he's really pissed because of course I pulled into the left lane right in front of him, winning our little race in a cheesy Honda although he's got Teutonic iron that I am supposed to respect and even be intimidated by.
So this moron FOLLOWS ME ALL THE WAY TO WORK. Once I park, he pops out of his Merc. The guy is big, and in his forties. He stands over top of my car as I climb out, briefcase in hand. I figure the guy is going to take a swing at me, but no! He decides to joust with me verbally. Heh. As you might expect, everything he says gets shoved right back in his face with an offensively flippant remark as I walk to the little shop where I still work to this day. Finally realizing that I am not intimidated, he heads back for his car, but before climbing in, he makes some derogatory schoolyard remark about my nose (!) that I haven't heard since the 10th grade (remember this guy is in his FORTIES). As I open the door to the shop and step inside, I say "Wah! Sore loser."
So NOW the asshole is REALLY PISSED. He walks into the shop, asks if I'm the owner. No. He wants to talk to the owner. By now, Fred (the boss) is already coming out of his office. Mr. Dickhead tries to convince Fred that I am a reckless driver, but Fred responds by telling the guy to get the fuck out of here. The guy calls Fred a few choice names and leaves, madder than ever. Fred and I have a good laugh over it, recalling that the guy (for whatever reason) told Fred that he is "in the bail bonds business" during the course of their argument. So we look up "bail bonds" in the phone book and sure enough, the guy's name (Jim French) and picture are all over the yellow pages! Turns out he owns the biggest bail bonds business in the town I live in, and has about 3 or 4 solid pages of ads in the phone book! We laugh our asses off at this.
Then, a few months later, in the local paper:
James Robert French, 47, of 8708 N.W. Lakecrest Ave., is to appear for arraignment this morning for SEVEN COUNTS OF CHILD MOLESTATION/CHILD RAPE and is wanted in California for another two charges of sexual assault. The alleged victims in both Washington and California are close relatives. French, who owns Clark County Bail Bonds, allegedly assaulted the victim over a five-year period.
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Post by Velkontés on Mar 11, 2012 4:44:32 GMT -5
Wow.
I can just imagine the conversation in the bar:
"hey dude, you know that guy who raped all those children? He totally lost his cool with me this one time when I didn't let him cut in front of me on the freeway. What a jackass."
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