Post by evilmasterbetty on Mar 25, 2008 0:23:26 GMT -5
want to sit at home Sunday and do anything but watch Wrestlemania.
That's right, for the first time in two decades I have no desire to watch this show. Why should I be psyched? Let's start with the card...
Bunnymania - OOOOH like i've never seen that before a hundred times. If I want porn, I'll watch porn. But this will just be fluff like it always is.
Finlay v. JBL - Could be good but I'm not entirely sold on the storyline. I just wish the whole Hornswaggle McMahon thing would just die off.
24 man battle royal - I'm still a bit confused on this. Does the winner face Chavo that night or later on? And even so, does anyone actually want to be ECW champion? Either way battle royals are usually fun so this should be decent to watch, although 24 entrances will be brutal.
Batista v. Umaga - Will either be surprisingly decent (Umaga v. Cena) or really awful (Umaga v. Steroid McNigger). There won't be a middle ground. Plus the winner is in no way in doubt.
Money in the Bank - Will be good, but I doubt it will be worth the price alone. It will either be CM Punk or Kennedy winning. Morrison, Benjamin and Carlito won't be getting it. MVP or Jericho might, but they both have singles titles and I don't think WWE wants to push either of them yet. So that only leaves one of two people. At least that's better than the last two years when there was only one guy. Still, I'd much rather see this as a TLC match or something, just to spice it up and make it even cooler.
HBK v. Flair - My pick for sleeper match if Flair can dig deep one last time. Plus this match has gotten the best build of anything (more later). Even if he can't, this will easily be the most emotional and coolest moment of the whole show. I hope something big happens for Flair. So, so far this is the only match I'm actually excited about.
Money v. The Big Show - This will honestly be probably the worst match in WM history, and that covers a lot of ground. Unless Mayweather can pull an LT-like performance this is going to be brutal. Plus, you know Mayweather has to win, which will make everyone else in the WWE who Big Show's beaten look even worse for what? Maybe an extra 50-100K buys? This is retarded. Show could have come back and really made a statement at WM, but instead he's going to have to job in this joke match.
Edge v. Undertaker (WHT) - Wait, what's this? A TITLE MATCH!? At WRESTLEMANIA?? INCONCEIVABLE!??!?! But seriously, how is this one of only two (maybe three) title matches? There's 10 titles in the WWE, and we have two booked matches. That's pathetic. Again, no tag title matches, no IC title match, no US title match, no women's title match. This is ridiculous. But i digress. This is the only other match on the card I give a rats ass about. It should be a great match considering who's in it and it won't disappoint. My only knock is it is pretty clear Taker will go 16-0, but I don't think anyone will complain.
Cena v. Orton v. HHH - Wow what a build. I really want to see this match...NOT! This may be the most apathetic I could have been to a title match ever. They had momentum after the Royal Rumble but just absolutely blew it. If this isn't more of the Same Old Shit then I don't know what is. Cena will win, Orton will do the job, and we begin the long awaited (and long dreaded) HHH v. Cena program that has never really materialized.
So you think with such an underwhelming card, that WWE would try to entice us to buy it...but nope you'd be wrong. After last week's apparently successful ending, this week we get a turd of an ending. First, we're supposed to have a "Wrestlemania Showcase" match. So to start the show we have 6 guys in the ring, the three triple threat contestants and the three top heels on RAW (Show is on Raw all the time so whatever) outside of Orton. So, following the theme of the last month, it would make sense to force the three to team up against the three heels. But noooo let's split them up and make it faces v. heels. OK that's still good. You have JBL and Umaga out there, so why not have Orton team with them and then add Batista and Finlay to the other team, that way you have everyone facing their WM opponents (except Big Show, but only because you can't expose money for free or else no one will want to watch that match). But NOOOOOO let's not do the second most logical thing, lets add HBK and Flair. So now you have like 4 angles going on in one match. That means you have unneccessary run ins from Finlay and Batista. You have Big Show dominating then leaving. You have Flair and HBK fighting amongst themselves. And then you end with the three triple threat guys fighting and building suspense to WM...you mean that last thing didn't happen? You mean you wouldn't PROMOTE YOUR FUCKING MAIN EVENT OF THE FUCKING BIGGEST PPV YOU DO DURING THE ENTIRE FUCKING YEAR DURING THE GO HOME ADDITION OF YOUR BIGGEST TV SHOW?
? Why is Flair (as good as he is) ending Raw making the champ tap out? He's not in the Main Event? Hell, you're already doing an awesome job on that build. In fact, other than Edge v. Taker it's the only match to really get a WM-type build. Ever other match is getting an ordinary PPV level build, and I guess that's why I can't bring myself to spend 60 bucks on this. I just don't give a rats ass. Thanks WWE. You made me not care about WM. Good job...
That's right, for the first time in two decades I have no desire to watch this show. Why should I be psyched? Let's start with the card...
Bunnymania - OOOOH like i've never seen that before a hundred times. If I want porn, I'll watch porn. But this will just be fluff like it always is.
Finlay v. JBL - Could be good but I'm not entirely sold on the storyline. I just wish the whole Hornswaggle McMahon thing would just die off.
24 man battle royal - I'm still a bit confused on this. Does the winner face Chavo that night or later on? And even so, does anyone actually want to be ECW champion? Either way battle royals are usually fun so this should be decent to watch, although 24 entrances will be brutal.
Batista v. Umaga - Will either be surprisingly decent (Umaga v. Cena) or really awful (Umaga v. Steroid McNigger). There won't be a middle ground. Plus the winner is in no way in doubt.
Money in the Bank - Will be good, but I doubt it will be worth the price alone. It will either be CM Punk or Kennedy winning. Morrison, Benjamin and Carlito won't be getting it. MVP or Jericho might, but they both have singles titles and I don't think WWE wants to push either of them yet. So that only leaves one of two people. At least that's better than the last two years when there was only one guy. Still, I'd much rather see this as a TLC match or something, just to spice it up and make it even cooler.
HBK v. Flair - My pick for sleeper match if Flair can dig deep one last time. Plus this match has gotten the best build of anything (more later). Even if he can't, this will easily be the most emotional and coolest moment of the whole show. I hope something big happens for Flair. So, so far this is the only match I'm actually excited about.
Money v. The Big Show - This will honestly be probably the worst match in WM history, and that covers a lot of ground. Unless Mayweather can pull an LT-like performance this is going to be brutal. Plus, you know Mayweather has to win, which will make everyone else in the WWE who Big Show's beaten look even worse for what? Maybe an extra 50-100K buys? This is retarded. Show could have come back and really made a statement at WM, but instead he's going to have to job in this joke match.
Edge v. Undertaker (WHT) - Wait, what's this? A TITLE MATCH!? At WRESTLEMANIA?? INCONCEIVABLE!??!?! But seriously, how is this one of only two (maybe three) title matches? There's 10 titles in the WWE, and we have two booked matches. That's pathetic. Again, no tag title matches, no IC title match, no US title match, no women's title match. This is ridiculous. But i digress. This is the only other match on the card I give a rats ass about. It should be a great match considering who's in it and it won't disappoint. My only knock is it is pretty clear Taker will go 16-0, but I don't think anyone will complain.
Cena v. Orton v. HHH - Wow what a build. I really want to see this match...NOT! This may be the most apathetic I could have been to a title match ever. They had momentum after the Royal Rumble but just absolutely blew it. If this isn't more of the Same Old Shit then I don't know what is. Cena will win, Orton will do the job, and we begin the long awaited (and long dreaded) HHH v. Cena program that has never really materialized.
So you think with such an underwhelming card, that WWE would try to entice us to buy it...but nope you'd be wrong. After last week's apparently successful ending, this week we get a turd of an ending. First, we're supposed to have a "Wrestlemania Showcase" match. So to start the show we have 6 guys in the ring, the three triple threat contestants and the three top heels on RAW (Show is on Raw all the time so whatever) outside of Orton. So, following the theme of the last month, it would make sense to force the three to team up against the three heels. But noooo let's split them up and make it faces v. heels. OK that's still good. You have JBL and Umaga out there, so why not have Orton team with them and then add Batista and Finlay to the other team, that way you have everyone facing their WM opponents (except Big Show, but only because you can't expose money for free or else no one will want to watch that match). But NOOOOOO let's not do the second most logical thing, lets add HBK and Flair. So now you have like 4 angles going on in one match. That means you have unneccessary run ins from Finlay and Batista. You have Big Show dominating then leaving. You have Flair and HBK fighting amongst themselves. And then you end with the three triple threat guys fighting and building suspense to WM...you mean that last thing didn't happen? You mean you wouldn't PROMOTE YOUR FUCKING MAIN EVENT OF THE FUCKING BIGGEST PPV YOU DO DURING THE ENTIRE FUCKING YEAR DURING THE GO HOME ADDITION OF YOUR BIGGEST TV SHOW?
? Why is Flair (as good as he is) ending Raw making the champ tap out? He's not in the Main Event? Hell, you're already doing an awesome job on that build. In fact, other than Edge v. Taker it's the only match to really get a WM-type build. Ever other match is getting an ordinary PPV level build, and I guess that's why I can't bring myself to spend 60 bucks on this. I just don't give a rats ass. Thanks WWE. You made me not care about WM. Good job...
