Rimble Ramble

[Velkontés]

Backstage, Dolph Ziggler whacks Cena in the nuts with a tire iron. "lol, now you won't be able to compete in the Rimble Ramble"

Ziggler survives until near the end. In fact, there are only two people left in the ring when #29, Kofi Kingston, comes out. Kofi eliminates Santino. Then Ziggler launches himself at Kofi, but Kofi hangs on, taking both of them out with their feet landing at the same time.

Of course, it's moot because the buzzer rings for #30, and Cena comes crawling out, grimmacing while clutching his nuts, and eventually climbs into the ring despite AJ tap dancing on his back to win the rumble and go to Wrestlemania to face The Rock probably.




That Vince Russo award is MINE this year, Mastersnit!

[Champ]

Let's see if we can book a TNA version of the WWE royal rumble

- the show opens up with the Miz vs Antonio Cesaro. The match is a 20 minute cardio performance/finisher fest with holy shit moments. Cesaro gets the win with the neutralizer

- Team Hell No vs. Rhodes Scholars. Cody Rhodes dances to the ring to his new music. Ironically, this is the best part of the show so far. The match gets going right of the bat and eventually turns into a holy shit finisher hitting contest. Team Rhodes scholars wins when Kane gets rolled up after a nut shot behind the ref's back

- interview with Miz. He claims that even though Cesaro won their match, he will now go on to winning the Royal Rumble and go to wrestlemania. The lights the go off.....then the lights turn back on and we see Aces and Eights The Shield beating down the Miz

- Alberto Del Rio vs the Big Show in a last man standing submission match, where the title can change on a count of 10.....or disqualification. Big Show beats Alberto with an inch of his life, but Alberto keeps coming back. This eventually gets the crowd to chant holy shit over the punishment they are putting each other through. Alberto gets the win after flipping a parking lot dumpster on big show with a fork lift for the count of 10

- CM Punk vs the Rock. The match starts off with classic wrestling then eventually evolves into a 25 minutes holy shit/finisher fest classic. This leads to the crowd chanting, "this is wrestling". The match concludes when Punk hits Rock with a fingerpoke of doom, thus leaving the crowd and commentators speechless. The Rock, CM Punk and Paul Heyman celebrate in the ring together.

- 30 man royal rumble. It starts off with Dolph Ziggler and Miz replacement(are they starting this shit already?) Seth Rollins. Rollins and Ziggler stand in the ring sizing eachother up for 90 seconds, then the 3rd entrant Hacksaw Jim Duggan comes in.

Rollins and Ziggler beat down Duggan and eliminate him just as the 4th entrant is coming out, who is Hornswoggle....no wait it's the great khali, they fooled us! *fast forward to 29*

Tamina enters the rumble with the hopes of being able to challenge Kaitlyn at mania for the divas title. She military presses Triple H(oh yeah, he was the suprise 28th entrant) over her head and tosses him over. Then Hornswoggle(who did legitamately enter later on) bites her ass and she flies over the top rope.

Number 30 goes off, it's John Cena. Cena starts cleaning house until it is down to Cena, Orton and Sheamus. Orton and Sheamus decide it's time to get rid of Cena and.....oh no, it's the Shield! The shield beats down Sheamus and Orton and Cena and the shield eliminate both. Cena wins with the Shield's help! OMG!

Then CM Punk, Rock, and Heyman come to the ring and they all celebrate. The show closes with the commentators going, I can't believe this, it's the Rock, Punk, and Cena with the Shield and Heyman! I can't believe this! So if Cena is the Rumble winner, does that mean he is challenging Alberto Del Rio or CM Punk at mania?! Show ends

EPIC FAIL

[Velkontés]

Gee, you could have waited more than two days before laying the smackdown on my Vince Russo award nomination, Champ.


I particularly liked Tamina entering the Rumble to get a shot at the Divas title.

[MasterSnit]

I won the Vince Russo Award For Outstanding Achievement In The Field of Shitty Fantasy Booking last year with this:

Maybe Eric Bischoff has put Madison up to it. So Madison will seduce Garrett and talk him into marriage. When they wed, they will both keep their own surnames and become the Rayne-Bischoffs. This will clear the way for Eric Bischoff to come back and use his own name and be in wrestling again.

Maybe TNA's stupidity has altered my brain for the worse because I was actually quite serious when I suggested that.



I think Ziggler will be the first entrant and the last to be eliminated. There isn't a clear winner this year, so I'm going with the tried and trusted "I think Cena will win" prediction.

I hope Punk retains but I expect Rock to win. Maybe The Rock and The Shield have been in cahoots all along. Or maybe Heyman has been playing Punk and Lesnar gets involved somehow.

[Champ]

I think the rock is winning the match but I don't think he's winning the belt. It feels like having rock come in and ending a 450 day title run just like that would be premature. But at the same time I don't see punk beating the rock.

I'm thinking rock wins by DQ and wins the belt at the chamber. Logically, either way rock would have to wrestle at the chamber. He can get his rematch there for punks DQ. Then punk could be one of the first 2 men to enter the chamber. That way when he loses he will have the heel excuse that it took 5 men to end his title reign.

I think cena is definitely winning the rumble. he just makes the most sense for the bigger picture at mania. i also agree with MS prediction that dolph will be there from beginning to end. Something tells me it'll be dolph vs Alberto for the belt. So dolph has to start looking strong. I imagine he will cash in on Alberto beforehand and Alberto will win it back at mania.

Miz vs cesaro I think cesaro will just go over clean. He seems to be on the super midcard push.

I have a feeling hell no are losing the belts tonight. It seems like Rhodes scholars have been invested into enough and they keep getting rematches. I don't think they're batista'ing it this time


Sent from my iPhone using ProBoards app

[Velkontés]

Jan 27, 2013 14:07:59 GMT -5 MasterSnit said:

I won the Vince Russo Award For Outstanding Achievement In The Field of Shitty Fantasy Booking last year with this:

Maybe Eric Bischoff has put Madison up to it. So Madison will seduce Garrett and talk him into marriage. When they wed, they will both keep their own surnames and become the Rayne-Bischoffs. This will clear the way for Eric Bischoff to come back and use his own name and be in wrestling again.

Maybe TNA's stupidity has altered my brain for the worse because I was actually quite serious when I suggested that.

[MasterSnit]

Highlights for me, without at doubt, were Goldust and the Godfather making appearances. I love Goldust. And I doubted if we would ever hear Godfather's pimping theme again. He even had a couple of hoes with him. Lol.

Bo Dallas did pretty well for a nobody. In 24hrs he already managed to make Wade Barrett his pregnant dog. I did like how Wade made sure he mavened Dallas for eliminating him.

Punk v Rock was a decent match. I wasn't too fond of the finish. I would have liked Punk to win, so when it appeared that he had, only for Vince to screw him, it sort of soured the match a little for me.

Jericho returning out of nowhere was a good surprise also. His last return and run was quite dismal, so to just have him return without the usual hype was a good way to do it. Not sure about the tattoos though.

Alberto used duct tape to beat Big Show. Duct tape? Are you serious? That's something Hornswoggle would do!

Decent show. Nothing spectacular though.

[Champ]

Cena winning the rumble wasn't a shock to me at all. Punk vs rock I thought was going to be a DQ finish before the rumble. Speaking of the rumble, I hate when the rumble isn't the main event. The fuckin rock main events over everything

[MasterSnit]

Yeah, I was also hoping the Rumble would be on last. It just feels wrong to bump it down the card. It's probably the most anticipated match of the year for many fans.